low self esteem/mental breakdowns =/

[life in polaroids.]

ok...ive been trying to just do my best at controlling these issues, but now i need advice.

for the past..eh..month or so..ive been having breakdowns.
just crying pretty randomly when i get home from school.
Little things have been just setting me off.
yes i know, im 14, growing, hormones play a role.

but im also
paranoid
OCD
and i have VERY low self esteem

VERY low.
i try to control it, but i cant =/
its hard.
one day, im just like "you know what, i love myself. idc what people say."
the next day, i look in a mirror, and start bawling.
If someone looks at me, i take it personally.
im always afraid all teh rpetty girls are just..glaring at me [which they are a lot]
i wanna be like them kinda.
not really thio.
i just wanna be skinnier, maybea better attitude, and
i dont wanna be paranoid or all this.
i really hate how im living my life, and its pushing me to hate myself.
Please,someone, need help.
I knwo some of you are gonna say "everyone rpetty on the inside." or soemthing like that.
i think im very pretty on the inside, but i wanna be rpetty on the outside =/
some of you knwo what i look like..some dont.
because of my seld esteem.

please,advice?
i wanna be better at loving myself for ME.
if u read all this, ily.<3

[efronator.]

i think you should just
pick out the things you like
about yourself. for example;
i love my eyes.
just doing little things like that
help your self-esteem.
don't be intimidated by the
pretty girls, it makes life a whole lot
harder.
if you have a good heart & you have
found yourself, then you're better
off then girls that are pretty and know
it.

[life in polaroids.]

yea, i menat, im jealous of the rpetty girls that have good hearts
not the beeotchess.

and i mean..ive tried that.
theres not too much i like about myself.

my eyes..yea. i pretty much love my eyes
and this might sound conceited, but i love my heart and my mind..sometimes.

[efronator.]

^ there you go. (:
you just have to find those little things.

[designer_skyline.]

Taryn, why didn't you tell me about this?
you know you can come talk to me whenever, okay?

well, when i was feeling really bad about myself...
i thought about what the opposite of me would be,
and after that, i realized how much i loved being me.
just think of all the people out there that love you.
and even if some people don't seem to love you, they actually do.

about the crying and stuff...
maybe you just need someone to talk to?
i mean, talking about stuff, letting it all out, can really help.
if something's bothering you, you should definitely talk about it.
if you need to cry, just do it. Don't worry about the tears,
it's just your way of letting stuff go. Hopefully things'll get better for you soon.
i love you.
<3.

[JDO]

i went through a stage where i sort of burst into tears about everything.
and i seemed pretty depressed, and i have ocd but not majorly.
just little things, like dvds being straight, and in alphabetical order.
yet i do sometimes take it over the top like, i touch something, yet feel like i didnt touch it right so have to touch it again.
its proper weird but you may understand what i mean.
for the low selft esteem, i dont really know what to say.
im not very confident.
i have days where i dont like the look of myself and that, but i just go through with it.
its hard yeah, but just try and look on the good side of things.
if you want anymore help, ill try :]
just pm etc or leave me a message.

[annzie]

yes, i think you should pick out the good things,
like sammie said. i love my eyes and my smile and
my teeth.

taryn, you're you. and no one else is like you. that's
the amazing thing. i love you, for who you are. wouldn't
it be so .. boring if everyone looked .. perfect? i mean,
there isn't such thing as a 'perfect'. it's ~impossible.

but i am touchy too, i'll get really upset over stupid things,
and sometimes i just wanna cry. because it feels good.
talk to a counselor/family member/friend about it. you'll
feel better.

<3.

[life in polaroids.]

yea, thx guys.

i just like..idk.
i wanna lose weight.
and i try.
but i mean...i play soccer on weekends. i ge tout of my house.
Ii dont like...eat that badly.
its frustrating.

yea, htx guys. it helps

[lost in the stereo.]

dont EVER change yourself.
everyone pretty to someone, i know im not pretty to LOADS of girl and boys.
but gee, if i could change things about me, ill choose 100000 things.
but you should never ever wanna be someone your not, if god made you the way you are then your the way you are.
your beautiful.
x

[emily.]

babe i used to be the exact same,
and even though there are things you love about yourself,
you still dont think your pretty,
and its so hard to explain in wolds, haha

but you have to focus on what you love about yourself.
when your looking in the mirror and feel like your about to cry, stop yourself.
tell yourself how gogeous your eyes are
and how much you love them.

always focus on the positive,
and you will get out of this mess,
i promise (:

hope i help!(:

[emily.]

and rememeber being pretty comes from having confidence,
not the other way around.
so once you focus on that,m
you will start to see yourself as prettier,
and so will others!
;D

[Catastrophic]

i read this entire thing.

anyways i know how you feel.
everyone is insecure.
and my self esteem went to an all time low about a year ago.
i promise it's possible to feel better about yourself.
just surround yourself with friends who make you smile.
because smiling is the prettiest thing.
and idk what you look like but jsyk there are probably a ton of ppl who would kill to look like you.
also, you shouldn't expect to look like a supermodel. i don't think "perfection" is right.
also idk if this is relevant but if ur wearing comfy clothes u like & that fit well it might help?

[InnocentlyClumsy]

Aww Taryn honestly pretty girls have it harder than most.
It's a pain in the butt because people assume if ur pretty ur a brat and stuck up.
Pretty soon that's what you become, people HONESTLY hate me just by looking at me.
They think "oh she's one of them." and I'm not...at all like I hate myself most days too.
It sucks having people think ur pretty because guys are afraid of you. They'll go for the girls that aren't as pretty because they assume that's all they can get, so it lowers my own self esteem and then I go lower in the guys I like and for some reason the slimbuckets like pretty girls.

Ugh anyway that was my rant lol.
I hope it gets better.
Just realize that the pretty girls....don't feel very pretty themselves.
All they have going for them is the pressures to conform and enough toiletries to spend hours in the bathroom.

[laurie_ox]

If you don't like your appearance, try doing something new and bold with your hair or makeup or maybe wear something thats daring (obviously, not to the extent where you feel very self-conscious).
I remember last year, there was a period of time where I was very depressed and my life felt empty... how about taking up something new, or trying something you've always wanted to?

[luciddreams]

^changing something might help. like, a month ago i got my long hair cut short. the change boosted my confidence. a lot of people, even people i have never seen in my life, came up to me and said "ooh i love your hair". it made me smile. :]

or maybe start doing smaller things that make you feel pretty. like, when im having a crappy day, i have a spa day [or hour]. i wear comfy clothes, put on a clay face mask, paint my nails, and drink hot chocolate.

you could also do more things to calm yourself down. like, you could paint, or write, or bake and bring in snacks to your school. find something you really like to do, and then have some time every day or every week to do it.

[life in polaroids.]

yea,thanks.
im not really up for change,yet.

but lately, ive taken up photography. that helps.

[designer_skyline.]

...that's exactly why I wanna take up photography! (:

[anotherday]

your gorgeous. (:
dont alet anyone tell you differently.
i was once like the other girls i guess.
i used to be popular and i felt embarrassed
around people that werent popular.
then i moved.
and you know what even though i dont enjoy
not having many friends i realized how
amazing those people were.
and im kinda glad i am not popular anymore.
yeah its fun to have alot of pretty friends..and have
people want to be like you
but alot of them were biitches.
i love my friends now, they are amazing.
and im so glad i got the chance to realize that and not care
what other people think of me. because i found how great people can
be. you dont have to be all that to be someone inspirring. now
i dont care who anyone is or anyhting. and you really get to know
who they really are and meet some really great people.
dont hate on yourself so much because
you are a great person.

[Funhouse_x]

I'm goin through the exact same thing chick.
Like, this is dead personal to me, but i'll let you cos it might help.. maybe? :)

I've battled with my weight like, all my life.
I've been diagnosed with anorexia about 3 years ago,
so my self esteem was at an alltime low
i was like you; i'd look at myself and just.. cry.

but i knew i needed to get over it.
so i'd really try in the mornings when i was gettin ready
just so i knew i'd made the effort and i felt a little better about myself
gradually my weight got better.
but i was still feeling quite low,
and just little things like...
wearing your fave things,
puttin a bit of make up on,
and NOT looking up2 girls that i thought were
popular and pretty made it easier.
the popular and pretty girls are usually only popular
cos guys think they can get what they want
and if you think about it like this... even though thy have a large group of friends
there's always a LARGER group who can't stand them :)
when they look at you, think to yourself "theyre just jealous cos im a NICE girl"

Hope this helps youu :)
x

[mechanicaldummy.]

I've actually had the same stuff happen to me. Not loving yourself is probably the biggest issue people have. I say, if you can't love yourself, how do you expect for anyone to love you? And yea, just find the littlest things you love about yourself. People can say that you're conceited, but hey, you LOVE yourself. You're beautiful. Everyone is in their own way. I personally have struggled with weight for most of my life. That's what stopped me from loving myself. That gave me LOW self esteem. One day I looked in the mirror, and I saw ME. Look at yourself in the mirror and look deep into your own eyes. I started crying because I knew that I needed love from someone all my life, and that person was ME. I knew that I was beautiful. And you know what, your imperfections are what make you, YOU. They make you unique. They make you beautiful. They make you stand out from the crowd of sluuts all around you. You KNOW that you're better than them. It's kinda like how this lady I know told me... She was at a seminar one time, and she's like "Steve, you're such a moron" and he's like "Really? Why?". She was just speechless. She had no reason to say he was a moron. Same with life. Someone calls you a biitch, just say "Why?". They won't give you a good reason. Just be yourself. Be YOU because it's the best you can be. And walk by people and just smile. Smile like you love who you are, because you do. ;-)

[Funhouse_x]

Seriously, that made me cry. ^ ^
beautiful tbh (:
x

[saraaah]

yea, i menat, im jealous of the rpetty girls that have good hearts
not the beeotchess.

and i mean..ive tried that.
theres not too much i like about myself.

my eyes..yea. i pretty much love my eyes
and this might sound conceited, but i love my heart and my mind..sometimes.
its nice that you love your eyes,
maybe you could wear colours that compliment the colour of your eyes?
idk, i dont really know what to say hahah,
i hope you feel better soon (:

[saraaah]

I've actually had the same stuff happen to me. Not loving yourself is probably the biggest issue people have. I say, if you can't love yourself, how do you expect for anyone to love you? And yea, just find the littlest things you love about yourself. People can say that you're conceited, but hey, you LOVE yourself. You're beautiful. Everyone is in their own way. I personally have struggled with weight for most of my life. That's what stopped me from loving myself. That gave me LOW self esteem. One day I looked in the mirror, and I saw ME. Look at yourself in the mirror and look deep into your own eyes. I started crying because I knew that I needed love from someone all my life, and that person was ME. I knew that I was beautiful. And you know what, your imperfections are what make you, YOU. They make you unique. They make you beautiful. They make you stand out from the crowd of sluuts all around you. You KNOW that you're better than them. It's kinda like how this lady I know told me... She was at a seminar one time, and she's like "Steve, you're such a moron" and he's like "Really? Why?". She was just speechless. She had no reason to say he was a moron. Same with life. Someone calls you a biitch, just say "Why?". They won't give you a good reason. Just be yourself. Be YOU because it's the best you can be. And walk by people and just smile. Smile like you love who you are, because you do. ;-)
what they said!
hahah, thats lovely (:
you should consider work in literacy hahah

[svjoc1987]

ok...ive been trying to just do my best at controlling these issues, but now i need advice.

for the past..eh..month or so..ive been having breakdowns.
just crying pretty randomly when i get home from school.
Little things have been just setting me off.
yes i know, im 14, growing, hormones play a role.

but im also
paranoid
OCD
and i have VERY low self esteem

VERY low.
i try to control it, but i cant =/
its hard.
one day, im just like "you know what, i love myself. idc what people say."
the next day, i look in a mirror, and start bawling.
If someone looks at me, i take it personally.
im always afraid all teh rpetty girls are just..glaring at me [which they are a lot]
i wanna be like them kinda.
not really thio.
i just wanna be skinnier, maybea better attitude, and
i dont wanna be paranoid or all this.
i really hate how im living my life, and its pushing me to hate myself.
Please,someone, need help.
I knwo some of you are gonna say "everyone rpetty on the inside." or soemthing like that.
i think im very pretty on the inside, but i wanna be rpetty on the outside =/
some of you knwo what i look like..some dont.
because of my seld esteem.

please,advice?
i wanna be better at loving myself for ME.
if u read all this, ily.<3

Awww that sounds exactly how i am

have you talked to any of your family about how u feel??

if you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to pm me

and just remember its not always whats on the outside that counts coz just coz someone is pretty on the outsde doesnt make them a nicer person and everyone is special in their own way

[mechanicaldummy.]

what they said!
hahah, thats lovely (:
you should consider work in literacy hahah

haha. i've been told that SOOO many times it's not even funny. i've considered it but i really don't see what i can contribute to the world. no one cares about my life stories, so why share them. idk..